The 2015 Tesla Model S Will Electrify Your Giblets

It seems that in James Bond movies the villain always has a unique accent and is a self made gazillionaire yet is hell bent on world domination. Well it seems that Elon Musk is either a Bond villain, real-life Iron Man or simply an Axe body spray fragrance. Either way Mr. Musk is a brilliant man and deserves respect for his multiple achievements. The South African/Canadian/American (Don’t you dare call him white) has been the spine behind PayPal, Space X and now Tesla. Going against the odds like the great pioneers of yesteryear this man had all the skeptics playing him off as a nobody and now they are kissing his ass. Yes Tesla seems here to stay as their Model S vehicles are not only popular but downright desirable.

Tesla Model S Side

 

With the Prius it was understood that you were sacrificing all fun for that needy bitch mother earth but the Tesla is a car that shows everyone that you have a tree hugging hotrod, and some swag to go along with it. Since the Tesla Model S sedan is faster than most sport coupes in terms of acceleration means that you really only sacrifice the long distances that require multiple fill-ups with a regular petrol vehicle.

Tesla Model S Rear

And it doesn’t stop there, Tesla is in talks with Apple to make an autonomous vehicle that will drive itself thus letting you actually text and drive without being an amazing dickhole. The only problem I see with this is that if a creepy green cloud forms overhead and Emilio Estevez is near then you will soon have a sentient vehicle that will try and run you over. This however has not been seen in decades and not really by a whole lot of people so this joke will ultimately fail. But with a Tesla Crossover soon to be in production that shares the same platform it looks like Tesla and Apple will soon rule and ultimately ruin your life until the Demolition Man shows up to save us.

Tesla Model S Interior

What is impressive is the amount of technology going into battery design as well as charging facilities. Since the questionable GearHead popularity is gone we will soon see more stations popping up with the rapid advancement of these technologies we not only see range extending but also a quicker charge time and cheaper overall cost. What is even crazier is the fact that you could power your home in the event of a power outage with your car! How cool is that. So although you can’t shut the garage door, rev the engine and affixiate yourself with this car you can at least drive it fast an quietly off a bluff if you feel like you can’t take the charge time anymore.

Tesla Model S

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